September 16, 2004

• This is from a Three_Headed_Sarahs web page. 

  
  

  MADNESS ON XANGA! The following is from a mad geezer on Xanga, is he safe? Is he sane? Is he from our planet??? Does the FBI know?

  
  

  Ah the pipes!” Our Creator loved their sound in Scotland, we love their sound in Ireland, but even more, we loved the Irish flute.
  

  
  

  Could we play them though?
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  READERS MISS THE NEXT FEW BITS, UNTIL THE “HELLO”, UNLESS YOU ARE MAD.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  There is a music tau, it’s from the Wyndham race, why is it that the violent races (not that Wyndhams kill their young) love music?
  

  
  

  Some humans are born with this tau, like those with perfect pitch, but it is rare. God gave each planet their own gift. Earth’s was hypnosis, did you know there are 114 species on Earth that can hypnotize, and all Earth races can do it with love and fear? Amazingly this tau is very rare off of Earth, just like humans can’t do other tau’s like the the one they call telepathy. We got that because when one three-headed adventurer gets a tau, the planet gets it.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  We get many taus by being born on various planets and able to send the new birth-learnt tau to all our race via our planet. Why have we three heads? For getting first the now universal pepi-tau, the Great Tau of teleportation,  the brilliant tau which was first pinched by our planet.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  The story is, the life-forms, were sent by thermodynamical means before we pinched the great tau, so we wanted the cruelly guarded Pepi tau. Anyroad, three of our race did a tau to the great Pepi-planet and sent the tau back to our planet. Instead of being killed the three gatherers were made to send a virus to our planet where all animal forms were fused to with three heads, (one from each of the three to give the Great Tau to us,) we could have conquered the universe with the teleportation tau, if we could have disguised ourselves.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  (We already had the shape-shifting tau, the one called by our mother “the jambon” because of it’s obsessive bad-acting, imagine you dear reader being George W Bush, you’ll do the things you know about him, you won’t know where the toilets are but you THINK he loves the whiskey, so first day of your jambon, you are drunk and telling your real life story to trigger-happy guards. That’s jambon)
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  But with three-heads, do you know how many other races out there have three heads? None!
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  HELLO
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Yes, the music, the kids and internet readers won’t give a beeches brook about tau, but music. You can’t meet the little people without music, esp the flute or the pipes of Ireland.
  

  
  

  “Taking us to see the little people?” whispered the kids to us in the infant playground.
  

  
  

  “Can any of you play the flute?”
  

  
  

  “My grandaddy can” said Forbes.
  

  
  

  “Can he be trusted with the tau?
  

  
  

  “He’s totally mad!” cried John C.
  

  
  

  He could be trusted.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Where did he live?
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  —
  

  
  

  Three-Headed Goliaths.

  
  

   

  
  

  ___________________________

  
  

  “By the Holy Cross of Jesus!” cried Forbes Senior. (yup, same name!) “I’ve gone and fecking died and I’m in hell!”
  

  
  

  “Stop Jam, stop ham-acting sir, the whole of Dublin knows of us.”
  

  
  

  “What do you want with me, I have no cat.”
  

  
  

  “That’s our mothers, look, your grandson says you can play the flute.”
  

  
  

  “You should hear my Danny Boy” he reached for his flute.
  

  
  

  Gordon Bennet, we had to get to school! “Not here, can you charm the socks off leprechauns?”
  

  
  

  “They don’t exist.”
  

  
  

  “Maybe not here, but they must have sometime, myths grow from facts.” That was a lie, but still…
  

  
  

  He was game.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  We told the kids later on our new friend.  Forbes said “great!” and John C said “Bollox.”
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  “Pain can come so quicky to the old” we told Ms Lawrence.
  

  
  

  “Will you stop kinaesthicating stuff across the room, if someone throws something at me, it falls to the ground on hitting me, that crayon just would not stop coming, kinaeswhatever is a force, a force that does not stop until it reaches it’s target…”
  

  
  

  “And falls into their lap, if it wasn’t for us, poor Luke would have been squashed dead under your massive weight.”
  

  
  

  “Shut up Larry, the three of you! A kid could get hurt!”
  

  
  

  “That’s why we send things above their hight.”
  

  
  

  “Wasn’t above mine, I swear the thing was alive.”
  

  
  

  “You just got in the way!”
  

  
  

  “Don’t bug me!”
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  The rest of the day was planning for a secret trip out on the morrow, Forbes Senior would bring Little Forbes and John C. to school the next day, and before school starts we’ll take the kids to see the little people.
  

  
  

  What could go wrong?
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  —
  

  
  

  Three-Headed Goliaths’
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  Lord Pineapple. LordPineapple (the schmuk!)
   

  • 2:24 pm
  • 23 Comments